Have you ever been in a position where someone asked you to do something and you did it, but then it was stone silence?
Well, that happened to me recently when someone asked me to make a recommendation for them.
I wrote it based on our relationship, which was a good working professional one, and I thought what I had written was stellar… but the person received it and there was nothing.
Initially, I didn't think much of it because I sent it over on a Saturday, but then I didn't hear anything. So Tuesday I sent a text message.
Hi! Did you get the recommendation?
I sent it via text because I was not sure if the problem was that the email didn’t go through. I need not have worried.
The person responded, Yes I did thank you, with a heart. It felt flat and totally out of character for her. I wondered what I’d done wrong, reviewing the recommendation five times, finding nothing but glowing things in it.
There was nothing I could have done differently, and yet I wondered…
Finally, I had an epiphany: sometimes you are going to do something for someone exactly as they ask you to do, it's going to be good, it's going to be solid, yet for whatever reason, it's not going to work out.
You have to get to the place where you release the why, to God, and let it go, because at the end of the day, it doesn't matter why. I know that sounds weird because we are taught to dig into things, to get to the bottom or the root of things, but what I have found is that getting to the bottom of things just leads us deeper down rabbit holes that really distract us from the work that we are supposed to be doing.
Our mission, vision and values are leading us in one direction and that is to love each person that we encounter to the best of our ability. Period. When I sent that recommendation that was positive, well written, and focused on the great work that that person did, I had accomplished my mission and there was nothing else to be done.
Whether that recommendation is/was used or not is not my concern.
What is my concern is that I was able to shine a bright light on the excellent person that showed up in my life through that recommendation. And whether it is used by that person to help them in their next endeavor or not was not the purpose of the recommendation. It was a reaffirmation of the wonderful person they are.
So the next time you are charged with doing something and you spend your time and it doesn't turn out quite like you thought it should or is not used at all, don't feel used or abused or that your time was wasted. Rather, reflect on how your time was spent, whether it was spent in a positive manner, and what you learned about yourself in the endeavour.
This way you continue to keep the focus on you and you continue to grow in your walk to becoming the best version of yourself possible.
This self-prioritization allows you to show up as the best version of yourself always and in all ways.
Dr Lynita Mitchell Blackwell is the Intuitive Business Coach who leads her clients to the ultimate successful life of peace, joy and fulfilment. Lynita is the best selling author of six books including Get Your Money Right in 30 Days and Live Life on Fire.
